reflections
I Am
The sum of my experiences
--
I am from gentle women with a soft touch
Women who wrestled with weak men
Women whose spirit and vision
Rose above anger and jealousy to anchor my faith
I am from the weak men
Who let their ego and hubris
Determine their actions as they
Heard a relentless drumbeat
Of worthlessness, never “getting a break”
I am from the kindness of strangers
Strangely more kind than family
I am from the curiosity of cats
And the obsequious groveling of dogs
A feline affinity with a canine psychosis
From a worship of nature and a
fascination with the sky
And all things in it
I am from a vision of airplanes and spaceships
Seeing stars and constellations
Clouds, birds and butterflies — especially birds
From flying like a bird in dreams to escape
From a vortex of potential never to be realized
From skydiving when the chute did not open
Or so it seemed
From forever being frightened by my shadow
Reminding me of my father within me
From fear of being too kind, not tough
From hearing “big boys don’t cry” and
Believing I was already a failure at age ten
